Some days as a parent are exhausting.
There are the days where Jackson is teething and he wants nothing more than to be held all day, and any time I need a moment to myself, he begins to whine.
There are the days where he wants to exert his ability to make choices, and he insists the only place he will eat his dinner is in my lap at the table, rather than in his high chair.
There are the days where he can’t quite communicate what he feels like he needs to say, and every interaction ends with him crying on the floor.
Sometimes it’s just hard.
I love these quiet moments!
One thing I’ve been really working on reminding myself on these hard days is that it won’t last forever. I’ve mentioned that I’m reading Hands Free Mama right now and one of the things she talks about is finding “moments that matter” in the hard times in your life. So lately, I’ve been looking for those moments that matter when Jackson is having a rough day – it’s a lot easier than I thought it would be, and it makes a huge difference in my attitude.
Jackson is whiny and clingy and I can’t get anything done? Some day he’ll be too cool to hug me in front of his friends. I want to embrace these snuggles while they’re still freely offered.
Jackson insists on eating in my lap when all I want is five minutes to myself? Some day he’ll be too big to sit in my lap. The gleeful giggle that he lets out when I pull him up to sit with me is really all I need to get over this one.
Jackson can’t communicate what he wants and is screaming at me instead? I have a kid who is learning how to talk, he’s trying as hard as he can, and he’s making progress every day. My job is to be calm and help him navigate this tricky time in his life.
Looking for these moments in my daily life have completely changed my attitude when Jackson is having a hard day. I remind myself that, to him, almost every challenge he comes up against really is one of the most difficult things he’s ever dealt with, and he hasn’t learned who to regulate those emotions on his own yet. Toddlerhood is just a passing phase in his life and it will be gone before we know it – I find that my days are much better and more positive when I’m able to remind myself that these clingy, snuggly days are quickly slipping away. Soon he’ll be a rambunctious boy who doesn’t have time to hang with his mom, so rather than sigh with exhaustion when he runs up to me for the millionth time in a day yelling “mama mama mama,” I’m trying to soak up his sweet little voice and scoop him up with a smile. After all, it won’t last forever.
How do you keep a positive attitude when your toddler or baby is going through a clingy or difficult phase?
blogger / nectarine / 2600 posts
Yes there is truth in the statement, the days are long the years are fast. Its hard are when you are in the day to day grind of childhood but it goes quickly too when you look back. Some days are harder than others for sure, be gentle with yourself too mommy can only take so much as well.
wonderful olive / 19353 posts
Yes on the frustration when he’s trying to communicate and I can’t understand him. When I try the this? no. This? no. and we both get upset? oh man… So, so hard to keep my cool and not pull my hair out. but like you said, it won’t last forever! And before you know it, I’m going to be reminiscing when he wasn’t able to fully communicate with me vs being a teenager with their attitudes and what not. lol
blogger / pomegranate / 3044 posts
The lack of clear communication is the hardest for me, I feel you!
papaya / 10343 posts
I remind myself of this all the time! The most frustrating thing for me is not the whining or the crying or the clinging or any of that– its not knowing WHAT is wrong. I wish I knew if it was teething or if it was a tummy ache or if she was frustrated because of X. She’s a bit younger than Jackson (13mo) so her communication is about nil and I just legit have no idea what is her issue most of the time when she’s cranky and that makes me feel like a crappy mom because people are all “whats wrong?” and I’m all “I HAVE NO IDEA THANKS FOR ASKING.”
But anyways. I try to just focus on the good moments. And think of how lucky I am that I have a kid to have annoying moments with. And when I’m rocking her at 2am… again… I remember that some night will be the last night I’ll rock her to sleep, and I have no idea when that will be, and I probably won’t even realize it when it happens… then I usually end up crying because she’s growing up so fast even though I love it and then I feel better about it all lol.
blogger / apricot / 349 posts
I think the not being able to communicate is the biggest thing. It’s like she knows what she is talking about but she can’t convey it to us so there is so much frustration on both our parts– her trying to communicate and me, trying to decode. I think having a good attitude like me you mentioned and just realizing that it’s just as hard for them if not more than it is for you helps keep things in perspective.
blogger / nectarine / 2687 posts
Some days are SO rough, but I try to focus on at least one positive thing that happened each day. Sometimes it’s a stretch!!!