This is a guest post by Hellobee community member skipra. You can read Part I of her story here.

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It was not until the whole family left and we went back home after the funeral that we could begin to process the miscarriage. I think the conversation that my husband and I had was the most real we have ever been with each other. I told him that although I was fully prepared to never have children, seeing that positive test actually made me excited. He said that it caught him so off-guard that he was initially scared to death but as it started to sink in, he became excited.

We decided that I would chart again to see if I was ovulating and we would officially start trying. If it happened once, it might happen again, right?

As a side note, after getting the positive test, I was absolutely stunned because I did not think I was getting my period at all since my stepfather got sick. I had a period in June after my LEEP and then one in August. In September, I spotted lightly a few days and contributed it to stress because I had a similar experience in the past. In October I had the same spotting and also didn’t even think about it. It wasn’t until after I got the first positive test that I thought back and realized that I had three periods approximately 30 days apart. My doctor told me that stress can cause lighter periods and they were probably all ovulatory cycles. It’s possible that the weight loss and/or the newly clean cervix after the LEEP may have reset my cycle, or it just naturally happened on its own. It’s a complete mystery but apparently it was “fixed” since August and I didn’t even know it.

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December 2011

Fertility Friend detected ovulation on December 1. With all the recent stress and my history, I did not have high expectations, but there was some hope based on our timing. As the month progressed I did not feel pregnant and my period arrived on the 15th. My period was slightly heavier than the previous months but was still short. My husband and I took advantage of the brevity at first opportunity. I noticed some cervical mucus just a couple days after my period ended, the first time since the LEEP. I took an opk and it was positive, but I thought it was impossible because it was less than a week after my period started.

My stepfather’s birthday was the 22nd and I felt what I think were ovulation cramps that day at a dentist appointment, of all times. I tried to temp in the days following, but came down with a nasty cold and couldn’t sleep through the night so I gave up. I was mostly recovered but still a little under the weather on New Year’s Eve. I tried to drink a glass of champagne and it tasted terrible to me. Despite not great timing (just the one time right after my period ended and once a full day after the suspected ovulation), I wondered if it was possible that I was pregnant again.

January 2012

I woke up on New Year’s Day and tested faintly positive on my one remaining Amazon strip. I refused to test again until it was a full two weeks after my suspected ovulation. My husband and I were cautiously excited. On January 4, I bought a 3 pack of FRER tests from CVS, fully expecting the same experience as in November when I got a negative. I was planning to wait until the 5th, but obviously any girl TTC with a pregnancy test in her hand and previous faint positives can’t wait!

I got a very beautiful positive on the same test brand that would not give me one with my miscarriage. I could not believe it and especially could not believe the timing. How was it possible that I had a short cycle when normally they ranged anywhere from 30 – 70 days? How crazy was it that I conceived on my stepfather’s birthday, just a month after he passed away? It really felt like it was a gift that he was giving us, and especially one to help my mom get through such a difficult time. That weekend we visited my mom and shared the news. It was a difficult decision – whether or not to tell her so early especially given my recent miscarriage and the higher rate of miscarriage for women with PCOS – but even if the pregnancy did not progress, this time I wanted her to know about it.

I don’t think anything else could have brought her more joy. I know she is certain that it is a sign my stepfather is watching out for all of us, which helps her get through the pain of losing him one day at a time. I cannot possibly think of any better outcome. I was so convinced that I would never have any children that it was like a fact to me. It really just goes to show you that in the face of loss and pain, happy surprises can happen when you least expect them.

We call this baby a gift my stepfather gave our family to help us get through one of the most difficult times in our lives. Our miracle baby is due in mid-September.