I’m a planner at heart. This, in many ways, made my wedding very easy (although time intensive!) because I could manage each and every part. Flowers, transportation, timing, cake, etc., etc.
The things I’ve learned about pregnancy/babies: you can’t control when you will get pregnant (it took us 6 months to get knocked up), you have no clue how you’re going to feel at any point in the process (so you prepare yourself for nausea 24/7 just in case), and once you get closer to the due date, baby can show up whenever he/she very well pleases.
It’s this last part that scares the utter and complete crap out of me. I can’t plan my last day of work before maternity leave like I could my last day before my wedding and honeymoon. If I decide to start taking time off 1 week before my due date, I could end up sitting around my house for 3 weeks if I go 2 weeks over my due date. And since my practice does not typically induce labor, 2 weeks over is not uncommon.
What I can do to begin preparing myself is create a birth plan. A plan which, I know, may get thrown out the window depending on how our little peanut decides to come into the world. But at least getting something down on paper will help me plan/think about the day.
For starters, we have decided to hire a doula. A doula is someone who provides non-medical support to women and their families during labor and childbirth. We actually met with a fabulous doula last week and jumped at the chance to hire her. She was incredibly kind, has attended 38 births (and counting!), is a licensed massage therapist, and delivered with the same midwife practice 4 years ago.
Having a doula will help us in a variety of areas: allowing me to labor at home for as long as possible, advising on pain management techniques to help me achieve my goal of having a natural birth, giving Mr. Hopscotch advice on different ways he can comfort me during labor, helping with breastfeeding once the baby arrives, etc.
I’ve decided just to have Mr. Hopscotch and our doula in the room when I give birth. Family is welcome to come before and after, but I definitely don’t think I would feel comfortable with anyone else there.
My hope is to labor at home for as long as possible, under the guidance of my doula. This will allow me to be more relaxed in my home environment, walk around as much as I need to, rest, and do whatever will be most comfortable. Since the hospital is a 10 minute drive away, we can get there quickly.
My hospital allows me to wear my own comfortable clothing while I labor. While a great option, I honestly think that once I arrive at the hospital, I’m just going to want to throw on the gown they give me and call it a day!
I can also bring snacks (there’s a fridge in the room) and they will provide 3 meals a day. Again, I understand that eating might not be the first thing on my mind, but it’s great that they encourage you to keep your strength up, as labor can be a long process!
I know that the room I’ll be in should have a jacuzzi tub in it, but at this stage in the game, the thought of sitting in a tub while in labor is a huge turn off to me. Don’t ask me why, but I’m not a fan! Since we haven’t taken our childbirth class yet and I haven’t done a lot of research on anything else, I’m not sure if I’ll want to take advantage of a birthing stool or squatting bar, although I assume if it is considered helpful in the midst of labor, I’d go for it!
I know that, as of right now, I don’t want an epidural. I’m hoping to benefit from my doula’s massage background and use acupressure and massage as a means for dealing with pain.
While not along the lines of pain relief, something I do want to implement is goal setting. As a bit of background, I’m not the greatest runner in the world, so when I was really, really, really terrible at it and running with Mr. Hopscotch, he would always give me landmarks as goals to help keep me running (eg just make it to that mailbox… and when we would pass the mailbox… just make it to the next corner, etc). Working with goals is something that resonates well with me. And labor has, of course, the ultimate goal at the end – a baby! I’m hoping to use goal setting to make it through each contraction (eg just make it through this next contraction). I read somewhere about a woman successfully using this technique to avoid an epidural.
Until recently, all I knew about pushing was what I’d seen on tv: a nurse would see the contraction coming on the monitor and tell the woman to push. And this makes sense because if you have an epidural, you may or may not know when you’re having a contraction. I would like to be able to rely more on instinct when it comes to pushing, and potentially explore other positions beyond “lying with feet in stirrups.”
I’d like to avoid an episiotomy if I can, and understand that I more than likely will tear naturally.
I want my baby with me immediately after birth and allow the umbilical cord to stop pulsating before it’s clamped and cut (this is, apparently, healthier for baby). I’d like Mr. Hopscoth to cut the cord if it’s something he wants to do!
I want the baby to stay in the room with me as much as possible and if the baby has to leave the room, to have Mr. Hopscotch to go with him/her. Our hospital does 24-hour rooming in with the baby, which is what I would like.
I plan to breastfeed exclusively and will use the support of my doula as well as the lactation specialist at the hospital for any feeding issues.
I have no interest in leaving the hospital too soon! I will plan to stay for the suggested amount of time/amount of time my insurance provider covers.
I still have a lot to learn/think about/decide on as we get closer to the day. Overall, I have no super firm convictions about things (eg I want soft music playing while I stare at a picture of a calming waterfall while wearing my favorite t-shirt). But I know that I want to make choices that can potentially help me deliver a happy, healthy baby into a calm environment with the opportunity to bond right after birth. The rest we may have to just figure out as we go along!
*thanks to the Baby Center birth plan form as a guidelines for this post.
If you created a birth plan, how closely did you follow it?
pomegranate / 3053 posts
I’m usually a planner but my birth plan was to have a vaginal birth. Plain and simple. Okay, I might have had a general plan that I started writing but 2-3 weeks (can’t remember) before I had my son I found out he was breech so . We decided not to turn him (external version) due to the risks. And the topping on the cake was that both husband and I didn’t know what to expect b/c during the c-section part of our child birth class I went to the restroom while my husband didn’t pay any attention. During my c-section I either had a reaction to one of the medications they gave me (shortness of breath and dips in my blood pressure) or I had two panic attacks. They weren’t 100% sure what it was. Maybe a combination So my recommendation is to prepare for everything, especially if you’re a planner. I had an awesome OB and anesthesiologist though with the delivery of my first.
I’m due in a couple of months with #2 and will be having another c-section b/c I know how that is like. I don’t want to go through anything unexpected if I tried a VBAC which my OB said he is comfortable with. He left the decision up to me.
honeydew / 7968 posts
i have absolutely no plan right now. except that i’m pretty much set on c-section now. i’m definitely worried about the recovery time…. but i don’t want to risk trying to give birth vaginally and have to do an emergency c-section with the 2nd baby. (he’s still not head down)….
i wonder if they’ll cut the cord after it stops pulsating if you get a c-section. =T if we’re thinking about keeping the cord, do you think it matters if we wait for it to stop pulsating? ack! so much to know, so much to do, so little time!
grapefruit / 4671 posts
As of now, my birth plan is to deliver the baby while feeling teh least pain possible. If at all an option I would like to feel zero pain haha.
guest
It’s so good to have a plan in place. I hope everything goes well for you.
@tequiero21. I am a twin momma and had to have a csection because my two little ones shared a placenta. You should talk to your OB about specifics but I don’t think they can let the cord naturally stop pulsing for two reasons. Once baby a is out they will rush quickly to get baby b out. Two during a c section they will want to stitch you up right away so they take the placenta out quickly as well. My two little guys were delivered less than one minute apart. So talk to your dr. And see what they say but it might not work to leave them pulsing. I didn’t ask a lot of questions I was just happy to have my two little guys healthy we had a very difficult pregnancy so I let them do whatever they had to do. If your aren’t sharing a placenta you might not have the urgency of delivery that I did but I still think they try to go fast with c sections so you aren’t left open for a long time.
blogger / pomegranate / 3201 posts
Looks like a great plan to me! Your hospital seems to have a lot of great policies that will help you have a very positive experience, I think.
guest
Our little one is estimated to arrive in about three weeks, and my husband and I just came up with a similar plan. I was very nervous to talk to my doctor about my goals, and, looking back, I can’t believe I waited so long (35 weeks) to bring it up. He is incredibly supportive of our plan, which is something I felt would probably not be the case. I’m glad I brought it up… I know it’s a guide and not law, but I am eager to have the opportunity to at least try to birth the way I would like.
blogger / pineapple / 12381 posts
@plantains: I like your birthplan. That was mine as well!
guest
The reason it’s important to allow the cord to stop pulsating before cutting it is because your baby gets a burst of nutrients (including lots of iron) through the cord right at the end. It’s worth asking your doctors to wait on this.
I highly recommend having a doula. She was the best money I spent. My labor and birth were an amazing experience and much of it is thanks to her. Definitely check out doulamatch.net to find a doula that lives near you, you will not regret it!